yt: THIS IS SOME CRAP RIGHT HERE
yt: http://www.nava.org/Flag%20Design/city_survey.htm
L: omg I eat chipotle & have hot sauce now I have WEEVILS
L: Why did I do that
yt: that washington flag is not better than chicago
L: looks like stupid to me
L: I for one am outraged
L: TAKE IT TO THE STREETS
yt: portland is cool
L: irving loooks like a […]
Bill Callahan:
I noticed the other day that the first song on A River Ain’t Too Much to Love ends with a bird migrating south for the winter and the last song on the record ends with a phoenix flying out of whatever it is a phoenix flies out of. The living death of fire. I […]
From Captain Beefheart’s 10 Commandments of Guitar Playing:
Wait until the moon is out, then go outside, eat a multi-grained bread and play your guitar to a bush. If the bush dosen’t shake, eat another piece of bread.
(via)
The greatest campaign commercials in the history of democracy? adfreak: Presidential hopeful Mike Gravel.
“Whiskey - I like it, I always did, and that is the reason I never use it. ” –Robert E. Lee (via).
Zulkey.com
“I really liked your voice-over on Futurama,” I told a person who had once been one of most powerful men in the world. Seeing the dvd, he seemed to break out of his polite-but-numbed, repetitive book-signing stupor, saying, “You know there’s a movie coming out?”
Oldest known mushroom found
An Oregon scientist and a Kentucky nurse have found the oldest known mushroom, entombed in a 100-million-year-old piece of amber from Burma.
A closer examination of the nine-hundredths-inch-long mushroom cap revealed that it had been infected by an ancient parasite, which a second parasite was feeding on.
And:
Scientists have long assumed that fungi exist […]
Before watching faces in the morning I suppose I was as messy as a typical guy. The mood elevation produced by faces suddenly changed me: I discovered I enjoyed cleaning, and I started to spend lots of time (about an hour/day) doing it.
–Seth’s blog
Sentences on Conceptual Art
16. If words are used, and they proceed from ideas about art, then they are art and not literature; numbers are not mathematics.
The Heliocentric Pantheon: An Interview with Walter Murch
Think how difficult it would be to explain musical notation to someone from Ancient Egypt, when they did not even suspect the underlying mathematical laws of harmonics, let alone a way of writing it all down. Instead, for thousands of years, music was just a poetic metaphor […]
Elvis Presley saved Carlos The Party Guy‘ life when he was sick with a stroke.
It isn’t as if anyone ever intends to have that disgusting tub-ring, or pink mold in the toilet, or peeling paint, or a rust-speckled car, or a massive belly, or a failed marriage, or a bankrupt commercial enterprise: these things just happen while we aren’t taking the time or exerting the effort to properly maintain […]
Bush’s long vacations are more than a curiosity: They play into diametrically opposite arguments about this leadership style. To critics and late-night comics, they symbolize a lackadaisical approach to the world’s most important day job, an impression bolstered by Bush’s periodic two-hour midday exercise sessions and his disinclination to work nights or weekends. The more […]
I recently watched an episode of Knight Rider for the first time in about 20 years, and all I can say is that if this is indeed created, then for God’s sake destroy any imperfect prototypes. The last thing we need is a renegade research station on skiis acting like KARR.
New $100 Doll Smarter Than Your Daughter: “A CREEPY new doll called Amazing Amanda from Playmates Toys (on sale next month for $100) is more intelligent that your child — so intelligent she can “recognize” her own poop.” I don’t think I have any comment for this.
The fact that this page exists, and is not a joke, is enough to make you weep for the land of the free. Why aren’t people more outraged by this? Facism begins by exaggerating the threats to your safety and security and asking you to compromise in order to meet those threats. As the man […]
Putting for the Fences :
What makes the words ‘’professional miniature golfer’’ so funny? Is it the fact that the 167 members of the Professional Putters Association and the 80-odd members of the U.S. ProMiniGolf Association compete so hard for so little money?
That and the fact that you can’t help of tiny, golf-ball-sized humunculi in outrageous […]
Nice knowing you, Bill of Rights. It’s been awesome.
Two business professors, Robert Schindler at Rutgers and Morris Holbrook at Columbia, have spent years conducting studies in which they ask hundreds of subjects between the ages of 20 and 80 to compare current and past cultural offerings… The professors also asked a diverse group of subjects to rate celebrities, movies and cars from across […]
Coming in at #1 on the list of things I didn’t think I was going to find randomly on the internet today is Frank Black interviewing Ray Bradbury and talking about Jacques Tati.
Frank Black: The one filmmaker who has been able to make me cry is Jaques Tati.
Ray Bradbury: Well, I knew him very well, […]
The Awful Forums - Memories of an old Chicago Cop
I was a cop under hizzoner da mayor 66-70. And back then there were two important things to know about Chicago.
First, the government and the police and fire departments were corrupt. For example, while one fireman is checking out the smoke in your living room another […]
Paper pulls classic hoax on vanity publishers:
Mohammed Aissaoui, of Le Figaro, said: “These committees should have been surprised at the literary quality, at the style of this text and at the absence of faults, which contrast sharply with what they usually receive.”
I declare this phenomenal song from the upcoming My Morning Jacket album to be the song of the summer: Off The Record. Because songs that leave no jams unkicked-out while being inadvertantly topical cannot be denied.
The word on the street has it that Nas got into a bidding war with Puffity Duffity Daddy over what is supposed to be the Holy Grail of beats, a beat by uber-producers the Neptunes. The final bid? $2 million smackers. Nas paid $2 million dollars for a drum track. But it’s all about the […]
AMC TV Monsterfest Classic Horror Trailers
Paul Philips:
This year, I have a new chemical weapon: Modafinil. Like Adderall, it stimulates wakefulness and enhances focus but without the annoying side effects of an amphetamine—for me, reduced appetite and insomnia. Drugs are not a substitute for healthy living habits, but the WSOP isn’t a spa. With Modafinil, I feel well-rested even on limited […]
Other grammatical features are less widely known but are no less important. SAE [Southern American English] also modifies the English auxiliary system by allowing for the use of more than one modal in a verb phrase. For instance, for most Southerners “I might could leave work early today” is a grammatically acceptable sentence. It translates […]
I haven’t seen the show, but I’m thinking of starting up one of those famously effectual online petitions and sending it to Bravo. It will be called “Stop Being Bobby Brown.”
Which is odd, because while I don’t want to watch it I’m not sure I want it to stop.
lil’ markie:
At one point, he acts out the part of a baby fetus, telling how happy he is to have fully formed fingernails at 4 1/2 weeks, and a well functioning heart after 6 1/2 weeks, etc., etc.
I think this guy Morgan Spurlock (Super-Size Me, the new show 30 days), no matter if what he’s done is good or bad, is going to be around for a while. His name is too good not to be a personality on television in perpetuity. Morgan Spurlock.
In a story on the newly-discovered Sappho poem: “On hearing one of Sappho’s poems sung, the sixth century BC Greek ruler Solon, a contemporary of hers, asked for someone to teach him the song ‘because I want to learn it and die’.”
Government has an obligation to present information to the public promptly and accurately so that the public’s evaluation of Government activities is not distorted.
–Donald Rumsfeld, 1967
Peter Bowles apparently gave a speech in Blow Up that explained what the whole thing was about, but Antonioni Cut it:
He listened, and listened, until finally I ran out of words. There was silence. So I said, “Erm, sir, are you going to put the speech back in now?” He replied, “No. Because, Peter, you […]
I have overcome the obstacle life laid before me. I bought the music issue of The Believer, only to discover, too late, that someone had already taken the CD. I’ve got my own copy now, and you probably should get one for yourself.
I get a weird excitement listening to artists I don’t know covering other […]
“Anything can happen in this life, especially nothing.”
Remember that time my future self visited me by using his time machine? I found his/my diary, wherein he/I dug up this article. His/my comments: “Wow, our descent from crypto-facism into actual religious fanatacisim seems so obvious now.”
“Chicago appealed to Eugenides and his wife, the photographer Karen Yamauchi, when they decided to return to the States partly because they have a 6-year-old daughter now. “I view it as a Denmark kind of place. Cold, well-run–a clean, beautiful, pristine city where you can have a nice life and bring up kids and not […]
“The unemployed! The sick! Those sent mad by work (and I will use that simple, undifferentiated word mad)! If you could not link hands with the others, if you were as yet unnetworked, depending on the slow, too-slow computers at your local library, and wandering through streets from which everyone you once knew had moved, […]
Digested read - Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer:
“I’m nine years old and I’m an inventor, computer consultant, astronomer, historian, lepidopterist, and I write to Stephen Hawking. I’m no ordinary boy, but the creation of a writer who’s trying too hard. That’s why you’ll find doodles, photographs, pages with just a few […]
” It’s not easy to be an English major these days, or any student of the humanities. It requires a certain kind of determination, and a refusal — an annoying refusal, for some of our friends and families, and for a good many employers — to make decisions, or at least to make the kind […]
David’s New Movie: “INLAND EMPIRE” (in capitals, though Lynch doesn’t explain why), it stars Laura Dern, along with Justin Theroux, Harry Dean Stanton, Jeremy Irons and a host of others Lynch won’t specify.
Hair on the chinny-chin chin: “Derrek Lee is perfect. He is perfect at hitting home runs, perfect at scooping up wide throws to first, and perfect when it comes to grooming his goatee. Not too long, not too stubbly, well-defined edges. Derrek Lee is perfect.”
It’s never too late to jump on the “Holy shit, how crazy is Tom Cruise?” bandwagon. Thus, Tom Cruise’s Medical forum.
In this interview from Plan B Magazine [what is Plan B Magazine? Should I have heard of it? Can I find it in this country? etc.], Matt Friedberger of the Fiery Furnaces reveals which of his songs he considers to be his and Eleanor’s theme songs. That would be ‘Spaniolated’ for Eleanor, and the second […]
Chekhov said: “Fledgling authors frequently should do the following; bend the notebook in half and tear off the first half … you’ll only have to change the beginning of the second half a little bit and the story will be utterly comprehensible. Everything that has no direct relation to the story must be ruthlessly thrown […]
